The App department in my iPad just offered to update my Space-Time Continuum. This is amazing news. I feel like I’ve been hurled Back to the Future. I am poised to be updated. And holy smokes am I ready for this update! My Space-Time Continuum has been causing me grief for years. My Flux Capacitator is revving.
This could be an exciting day for me – I’m so thankful that someone finally realized we could do better in the space-time department. I’ve been taking up too much space for a long time – I’m hoping the update fixes my gravitational problem as well. A few inches off my girth should equal a few pounds off the scale in no time at all – this could be a trifecta update! This update could be the one I’ve been waiting for – the one of my dreams. I’m rather beside myself.
Trust Apple to develop a space-time update, they’ve had their finger on the pulse of humanity for years. They’ve been inventing things we didn’t know we couldn’t live without since the first shiny decal took a bite out of technology. I’m actually quite surprised it took them this long to address our space-time problem.
People will be singing in the shower today – I’m pretty certain I’m not the only one doing a happy dance this morning.
It’s actually fitting that an app has been developed to make a positive impact on us physically. Perhaps the Space-Time Continuum fix will make up for a blatant disregard they have had for human frailties, we are an easily tempted species. Despite evidence and warnings, humans fly in the face of danger – texting thumb syndrome has plagued many dedicated users of this fast paced technology. It may be easier to cope with arthritic digits if we are at least coping from a better space and time.
The Space-Time Continuum Update purportedly fixes bugs and improves stability on YouTube. Wait… YouTube? I thought it was an update for You…. or for me. I’m going to need a little space to cope with my disappointment – and a little time. I hope YouTube appreciates the update as much as I would have.