The COVID19 Nineteen

I guess there’s comfort in the fact most of us are doing it; staying at home, watching too much television and wearing a path from the couch to the refrigerator.  We are eating out of boredom, bingeing on Netflix and gaining weight at alarming rates – so much so the problem has been deemed a syndrome and has acquired a name – the COVID19 nineteen.

I for one have a really good start on my nineteen – I’m not flattening any one of my curves.  I made a half a batch of cookies the other night – not because I was afraid I would eat an entire batch by myself (which I probably would have) but because I’d eaten half the bag of Chipits the night before. I scarfed those cookies in record time – I’ve gone from nibbling to gobbling and it ain’t pretty. 

Calories have not caught on to this social distancing thing – they are hanging out in groups so large the only way to disperse the gathering is to eat it.  I’m doing my part – I eat those gatherings even if I’m not hungry.  When I step up to the dinner plate without an appetite and eat anyway I feel like I’m taking one for the team.

I’m hoping the novelty of eating with abandon will wear off one of these days but I doubt it will – not even the heartiest vegetable could survive in this environment; turnips would be toast and kale – don’t even get me started.  I’m thankful baked goods volunteered to fill the void left by salads and side dishes. I can’t imagine getting through this confinement without the support of cookies and scones and cake and….

The COVID19 nineteen could well become a badge of honor – worn proudly as evidence we hunkered down when hunkering was required – that we chowed down when chowing…. forget it — there are no prizes for chowing.  We are all eating our way through this pandemic – I for one will worry about the nineteen when the 19 is contained.