A Tale of Two Elvas
My grandmother was fifty-four when my grandfather died. His was a sudden and unexpected death. He left behind a grieving widow and six devastated children. My mother used to share details of that tragic event with my brother and sisters and I every September on the anniversary of her father’s passing – it was a […]
Hindsight and Forgiveness
I would love to say I was the perfect, patient, loving spouse in those last few months of my husband’s life but the truth is I wasn’t. I was frustrated and angry and terrified. We didn’t know what the hell was going on and he and I were coming at the problem from two different […]
Milestones – the 200th Post
I am a person who likes to measure things, it motivates me. I began blogging in May 2017, in December I posted my 100th essay – a milestone. I celebrated the mark with a blog: I started the blog unsure about what I would write about – it turns out I’m not fussy, I will […]
On my way
I was walking the dog this afternoon, the sun was shining and a fall breeze was pushing newly dried leaves across the sidewalk. I was lost in thought; visions of back to school and days of yore; when a motorcycle screeched to a stop at the corner. I’m not up on motorcycles, one looks much […]
Leaving a mark
I’ve been walking beaches, picking up shells, feeling the wind on my face and listening to the surf. I have been lulled by the sea. My mind has wandered and I have been touched by the vastness of time. Eternity makes a person feel small – eternity makes this day short and splendid and unique. […]
A Chink in my Armor
I know the exact moment I turned into a machine, the minute my emotions dulled and I began to just function. It was like I walked into a wall and it hurt like hell. I remember gasping, burying my face in my hands and slumping into myself with such force I could hardly breathe. But […]
taking another step…
Travel Log. Day one I’m taking a holiday and I’m excited about it and tentative at the same time – it’s my first trip alone to this particular place. It isn’t the drive that’s giving me pause, it’s nostalgia. The west coast of Vancouver island was one of our favorite places to visit, it holds […]
The unstable sea
I don’t know what happened – after a few reasonable days in a row, on a quiet sunny afternoon the clouds rolled in and a storm arrived — my heart broke wide open again and I could hardly breathe. What the hell? I don’t get it — I have actually laughed recently, a real out […]
Duking it out
Years ago I read a magazine article – I was in a waiting room waiting for my turn to see the doctor. It must have been a long time ago, before the invention of cell phones, when waiting rooms still had magazines to entertain the waiters. The article caught my eye immediately and, although I […]
An unscheduled Post because the timing is right
Rather than writing about grief I thought I would write about writing about it; how it helps me cope and how sharing it has become part of my recovery. Documenting this journey, writing about this life changing event, helps me take a step back from the emotion of it and view it with a critical […]