Downsizing

The house hunting adventure I’ve embarked upon this month has stirred up some unfamiliar emotions and shed light on thoughts I didn’t know I was thinking – I feel like I’m mid-section into a learning curve again.  

I came into this adventure reluctantly, uncertain – I didn’t know what the hell I was shopping for, I only knew I was leaving home and my heart ached.  I couldn’t wrap my head around re-establishing myself or fitting my whole life into half the space it was already bursting out of.

My realtor is very intuitive, she has been showing me a melange of condos and townhouses; older established units, brand new funky digs; and she has been ‘reading’ me.  She is narrowing our search based on my reaction to each showing. I think our first few excursions were more fact finding than anything else. I’ve discovered I actually do have parameters and the list is quite lengthy – I may be a more discerning shopper than I thought.

Down sizing is tricky business, I’m going to have to start playing favorites with my stuff.  I’m going to have to pick and choose wisely – all these potential new homes have limited cupboard space and hiding places. I will not have the luxury of hucking stuff into the attic or the garage to deal with another day – the ‘another day’ is upon me.  The day of reckoning has arrived and as much as this stuff-liker likes her stuff a lot of it has to go.

I’ve been looking around my house and have discovered something that really surprised me – my sentimental past is a lot more recent than I imagined. The things I feel the most attached to are already on display.  What I anticipate taking with me into this next chapter doesn’t include the stuff buried at the back of the closets.  Sure, there will be things I’m reluctant to part with, but if I’m honest the attachment to something I haven’t laid eyes on for years isn’t very sincere. 

I’ve got a lot of work to do in the next couple of months but I’m starting to feel like it won’t be as heartbreaking as I have been anticipating. I think I might be ready for this change, this new chapter.  The story of me isn’t in the stuff I’ve collected, it’s in the memories I’ve made and I can take all of those with me, they’re already packed.