A Widow Blogger
When I began to blog I had no idea where this adventure would lead me. As 2018 dawned I wrote that I felt like I was teetering on the edge of a high diving board, afraid to make the leap but knowing I had to. A person can’t hesitate for long when standing on the […]
The unstable sea
I don’t know what happened – after a few reasonable days in a row, on a quiet sunny afternoon the clouds rolled in and a storm arrived — my heart broke wide open again and I could hardly breathe. What the hell? I don’t get it — I have actually laughed recently, a real out […]
Duking it out
Years ago I read a magazine article – I was in a waiting room waiting for my turn to see the doctor. It must have been a long time ago, before the invention of cell phones, when waiting rooms still had magazines to entertain the waiters. The article caught my eye immediately and, although I […]
An unscheduled Post because the timing is right
Rather than writing about grief I thought I would write about writing about it; how it helps me cope and how sharing it has become part of my recovery. Documenting this journey, writing about this life changing event, helps me take a step back from the emotion of it and view it with a critical […]
Getting a handle on guilt
I must be feeling better I’m starting to reach out. I’m making phone calls and dates, setting goals and making plans. I’m looking to the future and I find that a bit surprising. I’ve had a few good days in a row – that’s not to say they have been days without tears, but crying […]
The recipe for a lucky life
I think I was so busy living my life I never stopped long enough to appreciate it as much as I should have. That’s not to say I wasn’t grateful because I was, I counted my blessings, I knew I was fortunate. I just don’t think I appreciated the miracle of it enough. I was […]
Choosing to seize the day
There is a moment, first thing in the morning, where my only thought is that a new day has arrived. I float on sleep that is slowly retreating. And then I remember the house is empty and I wonder if I could just stay in bed forever. Heartache settles like a blanket around me. A […]
Little things
Times have changed in a hundred small ways around the house. I don’t turn the dishwasher on until I’m running low on coffee mugs, wine glasses or cereal bowls. My dinner plates haven’t seen the light of day for weeks. I do the laundry when I run out of clean underwear and even then I […]
Sympathy Cards
Canada Post has delivered more sympathy to my house recently than anything else, I got another card in the mail just yesterday – three and a half months after his passing. The card was lovely, the sentiment was sincere and the post mark was from half way around the world – the sorriness was probably […]