I never mastered the art of flirting – I’ve always been a ‘what you see is what you get’ kinda gal. I have little patience with women who play the ‘little girl’ flirty thing – in fact I have little patience when my little girls do it.
What’s with kids and the baby voice?
Our grand daughters are all school aged now (just barely – the youngest one graduated from preschool in June, the oldest one heads to grade two in the fall at the same time the middle one hits grade one). I have made a special drawer in my bathroom with my discarded lipsticks and eyeshadows – I let them paint their faces any time they want when they come over for the day. They have a dramatic sense of style. They also have a jewelry box filled with donated finery – I had no idea five and six year olds could look so royal.
I have a wonderful time with these little girls – they have become my besties – true BFFs. They are smart and funny, creative and crazy — I’m just nuts about them! But, each of them can make me want to lose my lunch when they turn on that flirty, baby voice.
It’s summer time now – the kids are out of school and I get to see more of them these days. They arrive, apply their makeup in the bathroom and then we generally take an adventure. I’m perfectly happy to appear in public with a princess. But so often, just before we lock the front door, I hear myself saying, “Talk like a big girl! You’re wearing lipstick for Pete sakes!!”
They’re cute, but hells bells, that voice just stops me cold.
I think my violent reaction harkens from my high school days. All the cute, bubbly blondes turned the heads of every guy, hot or not. Girls like me didn’t garner a second glance. The giggling in the hallways and the starry eyed guys leaning on their lockers made an uneasy maze for the self conscious to navigate. I hated high school for that reason above all.
I used to think I was missing something – I had no idea how to act like a doofus and still have any self respect. I have a sneaky suspicion my mother knocked that little girl voice out of me way back in the day. She had no time for nonsense either.
I’m wondering if I should start worrying about the effect my adverse reaction to the baby voice might be having on the girls. Perhaps this penchant for juvenile flirting is a prelude to popularity. Could I be jinxing their future dating prospects by nixing the antics now? And if so, is that really a bad thing? I mean, a five year old wearing lipstick is one thing, a seasoned flirt is quite another.
Comments (3)
Interesting. .. I wonder what kind of comments this will reap?
You and me, both, Elva. It’s easier for me to stomach it when it’s a child who’s using baby talk than when it’s a server in a restaurant, for example. I think you hit the nail on the head with your comment, “I had no idea how to act like a doofus and still have any self respect.” What kind of a guy thinks toddler-talk is appealing? Ew.
Once children go to school one loses a lot of control over the onfluences to which that child is exposed. So much is left to chance, be it a “good” teacher or certain group of friends…as their independence grows, it often coincides with the loss of the parents influence over their child. This can be either good or bad, or a combination of them both. Either way, I find most children at that age are testing the boundaries both of their parents and society, not to mention their peer group. Being a strong, stable influence is not a bad thing; nor is it wrong for a child to learn that “we” do things differently in our family. There’s a lot of comparison at this age – I think honesty, consistency, and providing the child with the instanding that not everyone does things the same way is a bad thing. Best wishes with those gorgeous grand babies – they certainly have the looks to get themselves through some awkward stages and a loving, strong family to support them along the way. PS – love your posts, Elva – I hear so much of nth Erica and Ali in them and hey enrich my understanding of both girls as you expose your thinking on certain matters. Best, sarah