Elva Stoelers

466 Posts Here

Act three

May 28, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories writing

The ocean was like glass yesterday morning, I noticed three kayakers and a guy on a paddle board in the distance – none of them seemed to disturb the water. I watched a few aggressive black birds trying to intimidate a lone eagle – ruffians, thugs – with one flap of the eagle’s enormous wings […]

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Walking the dog

May 26, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories writing

The ocean looked different this morning – deeper, if that’s possible. The tide was high and the clouds low, the horizon disappearing into a hazy grayness above the water. The world was monochrome – all memory and possibility seemed to hang in that mist over the waves.   I take this walk every morning – […]

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As good as it gets

May 21, 2019.Writing From The Wound.#grief recovery widowhood moving potential

As the dust of this moving business starts to settle so too does the reality of what’s just happened. I’ve taken the leap and the net has not appeared – yet.  The weather changed yesterday, sunshine gave way to grey skies and rain and I felt myself fall into a place I have been too […]

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The old girl on the new block

May 19, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood moving potential

So it turns out I might be the old girl on this new block, not that this is a bad thing.  I’ve been hanging out with young people on the regular for years – my kids are young people, they married young people and a couple of them have produced even younger people of their […]

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A change is as good as a rest

May 16, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories moving potential

I can feel myself changing in this new place.  A month ago I was tripping on boxes and movers, this three room house was a three ring circus. Today I find myself sitting in the quiet of the morning, one dog at my feet and the other by my side.  It’s taken us exactly one […]

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Lucky-ness

May 12, 2019.Momentos.#gratitude

I was walking the dogs early this Mother’s Day morning, thinking about my mother and her mother and my children and their children.  And counting my blessings.  I am one lucky mother and I have been lucky all my life – I am blessed.  An unusual sensation washed over me as I admitted my lucky-ness […]

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Thank you Facebook

May 10, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories writing

I love the nudges Facebook gives me – if one of my Facebook friends is having a birthday I get a gentle reminder.  I’m a more thoughtful friend with Facebook in my corner.  I also get reminded about things I’ve posted in the past; pictures, forwards and today of an announcement I made two years […]

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In the quiet of an evening

May 5, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories moving

The dogs and I spent a quiet evening at home last night, the first of what I’m certain will be many once I get settled and things settle down. I sat on familiar furniture, surrounded by familiar things in an unfamiliar place.  Although he has never walked in this front door I feel like he […]

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Today I Choose Happiness

May 1, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories moving

Although I’m feeling more settled with every passing day it still hits me in the face sometimes – this is where I live now, I’m never going home – and my heart aches. The aching is for something that doesn’t exist anymore and I try to put a lid on it before it has its […]

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Eleven days in…

April 27, 2019.Momentos.#grief recovery widowhood memories moving

I’m feeling a little more settled every day – I’m still dealing with boxes and unpacking but making progress. I think I’m going to like this place a lot once I get used to the changes in my life. Trying to create a new routine for the dogs is proving a bit of a challenge. […]

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